Oh goodness. Straight people just don’t get it. It’s about equal rights, not separate but equal. We’ve already proven that didn’t work in the 60′s. So I can protect my gay family by hiring a lawyer and spending lots of money to fill out the paper work so my insurance, retirement savings and property go to my family if I were to die, and give my partner permission to make medical decisions for me and even visit me in the hospital should I become seriously ill. A straight couple can just get married. How is that equal? Even then there are some things that can’t be covered legally. Take social security for instance. I’ve worked my ass off for 25 years paying into the system. If I were to die tomorrow, my family gets nothing. Your dad dies tomorrow (God forbid) and his wife and children get benefits from social security. How is that equal?

My company pays domestic partner benefits for me and my family, but because we are not married, those benefits are paid to me and I am then taxed on those benefits. Then the district takes the money back to pay for our medical insurance. What that does is put me in a higher tax bracket, so I end up paying more taxes. Married couples have their benefit costs subtracted before taxes. Is that equal? Not.

Now I think that the institution of marriage should be thrown out for everyone and civil unions should be implemented in its place. Marriage is an institution established in churches. People choose to get married in churches. They follow the beliefs of their respective religions. Their bibles say homosexuality is wrong, along with a whole slew of other sins that nobody seems to care about any more. And what about separation of church and state? What about the 3rd Amendment: Freedom of religion, which basically says I’m free to choose religion or not, and that no law “respecting an establishment of religion” can be made by Congress. There must be some fine print on the Bill of Rights saying “except for in the case of same sex marriage.”

So that was my argument, albeit short, but that is how I feel about marriage. I will be voting no on Proposition 102 in November.

You have to understand first that romance novels always follow a pattern. I personally hate that, so when I find a book that doesn’t, I instantly love it. The pattern is that there is a long build up for the couple to get together. Then they do and there is always great sex. Next there has to be something that happens that breaks them up, and the story ends, of course, with the couple coming back together to live happily ever after. Generally the break portion of a book is the part that always angers me. It’s always something stupid that makes them split. Well, H2H had an interesting plot twist.

A year prior to the couple in the book getting together, one had a heart transplant and the other lost her twin sister to an anneurism during child birth. Turns out that there was a strong possibility that the heart the main character received was from the other’s dead sister. And this, of course, freaked her out and she just couldn’t bare to be with the woman of her dreams if that was the case. She explained it as feeling like she was making love to her sister. I didn’t see it that way.

People donate organs to loved ones all the time. I thought it was a wonderful coincidence that if she did indeed have her sister’s heart, what a joy she was able to help save her life. I also thought what kind of karma was that that she actually made the decision to donate her sister’s organs and now the woman she loves is alive because of it. And to think that you still have a piece of your loved one with you all the time. Obviously that was not the mindset of the main character.

So she freaks out. Okay, but she really does nothing to find out the truth. That wasn’t believable to me. And it took so long for her to even talk to the woman she loved, to tell her how she felt. She just didn’t say anything. Sheesh! That made me mad.

I still liked the book though, and I appreciate that the canned part was actually a little different from the norm.

So back to the intended meaning of my tweet. I was actually trimming “real” bushes today – yesterday too. In fact, I’m still not finished. I hopefully will finish up tomorrow morning when it’s cool. I shot some video of the mess I called my backyard and the transformation to get it back to beautiful. Not because watching video of my backyard is compelling, but because I’m working on a video summer project where I am exploring all things video. I wanted to test out my Flip Mino camcorder and Windows Movie Maker on the PC. So I filmed my backyard, trimmed the bushes, and made this movie. No, if you’re looking for a video of the unintended meaning of trimming bush, you won’t find that here. Sorry @nooccar.

Trimming Bush from Coop on Vimeo.

Trimming Bush

I came out when I was 28. That was in 1993. Yes, I was a late bloomer – very confused in my youth to say the least. But anyway, this is not about that. When I came out I fell in what I thought was love for the first time in my life. It was simply amazing. Little did I know then that I was only in love with the idea of being in love with a woman instead of being in love with that first woman. Sad but true. I got my little heart broken anyway.

There was this band back then that I really loved, and they were called Soul for Real. And one song in particular really touched me. It was Candy Rain.

Soul for Real is a R&B group from Wheatley Heights, NY that experienced significant popularity during the 1990s, made up of brothers Andre, Brian, Christopher, and Jason Dalyrimple. Something of an urban 1990s version of the Jackson 5 crossed with Boyz II Men and Jodeci, the act has specialized in “hip-hop soul” numbers such as “Candy Rain” and “Every Little Thing I Do” (U.S. number 1 hit), both hit singles from their 1995 LP Candy Rain (Wikipedia).

In my sadness, I listened to that song non-stop. You can hear the song here or watch the video below. I loved this song because the words meant so much to me. It had a catchy chorus and the first verse went like this:

Have you ever loved someone
So much you thought you’d die?
Giving so much of yourself
It seems the only way
Tell me what you want, and I
And I will give it to you
‘Cause you are

OMG. I am cracking myself up with this. I was so pathetic. Here’s some more:

My love
Did you ever dream that it could be so right
I never thought that I would find
All that I need in life
All I want, all I need now I know
I know I found it in you
I found it in you
’cause you are

Well, she didn’t feel the same way, and all I had was the song. So I made my email and IM names soul4real to keep the memory alive. Gosh, I’m so glad I’m having to recall all of this because if it were a daily memory I might have to just smack myself. I’m all grown up now and realize how silly I was back then, but I still continue my online identity as soul4real. Every social networking site I sign up for has soul4real as my username, and now you ALL know why. It has been 13 years and still going. Enjoy the video:

It was definitely an interesting evening. We had everything from drag queens, to dancing, to singing, to drinking, of course. And we covered some ground starting in Phoenix, then out to Scottsdale and back to Phoenix. Half the time we had no clue where we were. It feels like you’re in a tunnel when your in the limo. You can’t see out the windows. The limo would pull up to a bar, and we would all pile out, look up at the place, and say in unison, “Oh, Amsterdam!” or “Oh, BS West!”

Every bar we went into turned into an instant party when we rolled up. The best was Forbidden. It was so dead we weren’t even sure it was open. We walked in and instantly started dancing and the whole place filled up. I think they were sad to see us go.

We got a nice welcome at BS West in Scottsdale. They saved us a big table right up front for the drag show. What is it with drag shows anyway? People love them. I don’t get it. But if you have to see one, I guess seeing the best is best. We were graced with a show by a Phoenix drag queen legend, Barbra Seville. Have a look:

So, it was an interesting night. Now I must rest up because I’m sure there will be another 40th birthday for someone right around the corner. Happy Birthday Kelly!. It was great celebrating with you.

Instead of getting a wife, which I just so happen to already have, I got a robot. Yep, a robot that vacuums the house when I’m not there. Not that I’m implying that a wife should vacuum because of course I’m not. But I’m all about anyone other than me having to do it, and I pick the robot.

I found the iRobot Roomba 4296 Remote Scheduler Robotic Vacuum on sale at Woot! this morning for $99. If you don’t know what Woot! is, you should hurry over and check it out.

Woot.com is an online store and community that focuses on selling cool stuff cheap.  They sell one item per day until it is sold out or until 11:59pm central time when it is replaced by the next day’s item. They offer a new item every single day.

The iRobot Roomba will clean all the flooring in my house and is small enough to go under tables, beds, and couches too. It works well on tile and carpeting, which we have both. No more wood floors for us after the move. The scheduling capability allows you to program your Roomba to clean at a preset time, up to 7 different times per week. And it comes with two  scheduling virtual walls that automatically turn on when you schedule your Roomba to clean. This can be used to block off a certain area of the house that you don’t want to clean. So I’m set for vacuuming. Now I just need something that washes dishes and cleans the bathroom.

Okay, I really don’t have a wife, nor do I really want one. What I have is a partner, and as the title entails, we share in all the chores of the house.  She may have done a little more vacuuming or Swiffering in our house than I have in the past, but I’ve certainly mowed more lawns than her. It’s a good balance. Now with our new iRobot Roomba there will one less chore to share.